Dancing is a sport. If I didn’t believe it before I started to dance I surely do now. And so I understand if long time dancers are touchy about this as I was one of the people they directed this touchiness too. I thought dancing was pretty, but not a sport.
Some dancers believe ballroom dancing should be an Olympic sport. It should be! I understand being protective of their sport. Touchy, however, is no excuse to be rude or exclusionary. Curious? Read on.
There are various dance clubs that work towards ballroom dancing as an officially recognize sport, the most well-known is probably USA dance, the local chapter in Indy is located here:
http://www.indyusadance.org/They promote dancing as a sport and are working very hard to get ballroom dancing into the Olympics. They are very serious about this goal; they sponsor various competitions, workshops, and dances. They promote official ballroom technique, both international and American style.
I get all if that. But…they ALSO promote their dances as social dances. Everyone is welcome, they say. All levels. All dancers. So last Friday evening Gary and I decided to attend one of their dances because it was at our beloved Starlite ballroom, and because we like to try new venues. Since we knew this group was serious with a capitol S, we dressed up. We arrived excited, dance shoes in hand, expecting to have a wonderful time and observe fabulous dancers.
Hello, we said to the man and woman taking the entrance fee. The woman stared at me; her eyes widened. She didn’t say anything. Gary repeated again. Hello? We’re here for the dance. The woman cleared her throat. You’re…guests. Yes, we said cheerily. Guests. You’re not students here, she said, brows raised. No, we answered, we’re
guests. Guests are allowed? I asked, now feeling decidedly unwelcome. The man butted in with a yes, that’s 15 a piece. So we paid and went in. The price was high…most dances, even if you are not a member of the club, are ten at the most.
We settled in. A man came over and chatted. He said the dancers here were GOOD, and that if he were a beginner he would feel BAD. I looked at Gary. Was that a warning? Weird. Then a couple sat down. The woman stared at my dance sneakers, gathered her stuff back up, and took off. The husband did shrug his shoulders but that was strange. My poor shoes got lots of disdainful looks during the course of the evening.
So the music started. It was all different kinds of ballroom, which we expected. We danced a lot. Of course, to some latin tunes we did our WCS plus cha cha, which Gary has dubbed the West Coast Cha. At our club dances people have asked us what dance was that in an admiring way. Here we got disdainful looks and many frowns. I do understand that being purists, they might not like it. That’s cool. But to look at us with obvious distain, well, that was rude.
The other odd thing they did was a forced mixer called a snowball. I have no problem with mixers…fine for anyone who wants to do them. Gary and I don’t. So the snowball snowballed us right out the door. As we left the presumed dude in charge ran after us. Thanks for coming, he said, please come back, and quickly returned to his spot on the floor. We had danced all evening. It was oh-so-obvious they knew we were there. We left suddenly in the middle of a dance.
Hello?
So. A couple of things. First, why do women have to be mean to other women? Do we not have enough trouble in this world with equality as far as men are concerned? I’m sorry to say most of the “looks” were from women. At first I thought it was in my head, but Gary noticed too.
Second, social dancing means just that…all levels, all ages, and dare I say, all kinds of dancing. Gary and I are club dancers; we mix styles, we make up steps, we modify combinations. Saying that, we are also polite, aka, we don’t run into anyone (and oh yes, Gary and I got whacked several times with ballroom flourishes), we don’t do crazy jumps, we don’t make fun of any particular styles, even if we don’t like it. We were respectful of the venue by dressing up, clapping for their exhibitions, etc. Bottom line; We were respectful of them. If this club did not want our kind there they should have made that plain on the website.
Three. Do ballroom dancers not think club dancers can’t be serious? The reason Gary and I dance is first and foremost to be together. BUT, we also are very serious about getting better. “Better”, in my opinion, does not have to be ballroom standard. For example, I know the rockabilly swing will never be an Olympic sport, but it is a hard dance and Gary and I are pushing ourselves to get better and better at it.
Four. There are other ballroom clubs/venues that ARE welcoming; the Continentals here in Indy treat you like an honored guest no matter how or what you dance, The Indianapolis Roof scene is a wonderful blended crowd, and the owners of the Starlite ballroom are happily indifferent on their Friday night practice sessions. The Starlite owners also allow other clubs, including the ones Gary and I are joined to, to rent their space.
I watched an exhibition last Friday of an international foxtrot. The couple was fabulous. Made me sad that the stars of club dancing would probably not be appreciated as “real” dancers at this venue. Too bad. Also too bad that of all the places Gary and I have tried in our three years of dancing, the Heartland dance has been the only one where we felt unwelcome, and will most likely never return.