Good Manners

On the heels of my jabby-jab post and a counter-balance to a post Gary wrote about the pressure to change dance partners, I have a nice addition.

Recently three people have commented about how lovely it is to see us dance together, and/or what a sweet couple we are. I’m ambivalent with compliments in general; not that I don’t recognize admiration for our dancing as a gift, it is, but compliments make me a little uncomfortable.

But compliments about Gary and my relationship seems different. I like that people can see how much in love we are. And I also was happy that perhaps people, at least three anyway, understand that choosing one dancing partner is just as valid as dancing with many.

At the very heart of our dancing is our relationship. We dance because it’s a fun way to spend time with one another…our dance evenings are our date nights. We support people who want to change partners. So it was very nice that we are supported for our choice.

I knew dancers were cool. :-)

Arms and Kicks and Lunges OH MY

This post is about manners. Gary usually covers this topic, but I’ve been bounced, butted, and run over more often than usual so I felt the need.

I’m like to begin with a statement about how Gary and I dance. We are energetic dancers. We often dance to very fast music. We know quite a few “tricks”, e.g. jumps, spins, dips, patterns that take up a lot of room. BUT…we never, ever do any of these when it’s crowded, and we tone down our exuberance when we need to. We also get out of the way, even when the reason we have to get out of the way is because someone is being rude.

Some of the worst offenders are ballroom dancers. Part of this is not their fault. They are taught that “correct” form means arms akimbo and steps that sometimes take a pair across the floor. And I even heard a ballroom instructor say about big flourishes “if there’s an empty space go and claim it!”. Really? Even if that empty space is part of the slot someone else is dancing in???? Apparently yes, to both the space and the wild arms. Shane, our Latin teacher, once said that arms can go up, arms can go down, arms NEVER go out. Latin clubs are crowded. And they detest what they call ballroom jabs. Me too.

I almost got run over a couple of weeks ago by a couple cha chaing right into the very small space Gary and I were dancing in. I turned and there they were, arms raised like two predatory birds, and heels ready to come down on my toes if Gary hadn’t pulled me away in time. Seesh. And no apology, either.

And if you think I’m just ranting about ballroom dancers, there are also a contingent of club dancers that do different, but no less rude, things. WCS dancers in particular. Dips over the head are lovely, but not at the edge of the dance floor and over our table…no joke. I could have put a swizzle stick down the woman’s front.

I know some of you ballroomers believe you must stick that arm out to be silvery level perfect. Clubbers...I know if you’ve just learned a fancy WCS move you wanna do it. We’ve felt the same way. But if there isn’t room there just isn’t. That’s what social dancing is.

There's a couple who come to the Indy Roof sometimes...they are definitely ballroom dancers, and really, really good ones. They do lots of fancy steps and even little routines within their social dancing. They are very flashy. But I’ve never seen them get in anyone's way. If they have room for their bling they do it, otherwise, they don't. A class act.

I'm not saying Gary and I never accidentally get in someone's way. We aren't always practitioners of perfect manners. But we try our best to be polite. And we always say we're sorry if we goof.

Ok. I’m done now.